Want To Be Able To Read People? Try These 9 Tips From Body Language Experts
Everything from facial movements to voice pitch to body positioning can help tell a story. To help us decipher those micro-expressions, we spoke with body language experts on their top tips and tricks for reading people.
What is nonverbal communication?
Nonverbal communication is any form of communication information or messages from one person to another without using your words. It can include everything from hand signals to physical appearance to body language. Body language is a form of nonverbal communication that includes facial expressions, gestures, posture, eye movement, Physical Touch and other signals indicated through the physical body.
Most of us have experienced moments when words escape us. We get too nervous, too shy, or too overwhelmed by emotions to think and speak clearly. In these instances, nonverbal cues speak for us. Since conversations are two-sided, that typically means the other person is left to read those nonverbals.
ant To Be Able To Read People? Try These 9 Tips From Body Language Experts
Abby Moore
Author: Abby Moore
Expert reviewer: Kristina Hallett, Ph.D., ABPP
December 11, 2020
Everything from facial movements to voice pitch to body positioning can help tell a story. To help us decipher those micro-expressions, we spoke with body language experts on their top tips and tricks for reading people.
What is nonverbal communication?
Nonverbal communication is any form of communication information or messages from one person to another without using your words. It can include everything from hand signals to physical appearance to body language. Body language is a form of nonverbal communication that includes facial expressions, gestures, posture, eye movement, physical touch, and other signals indicated through the physical body.
Most of us have experienced moments when words escape us. We get too nervous, too shy, or too overwhelmed by emotions to think and speak clearly. In these instances, nonverbal cues speak for us. Since conversations are two-sided, that typically means the other person is left to read those nonverbals.
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Tips to read people:
1.
Learn to distinguish positive and negative body language.
Oftentimes, body language can be compartmentalized into “negative” or “positive,” body language expert Blanca Cobb, M.S., tells mbg. When someone’s body tenses up, that’s a common “negative” expression, which may be related to stress, discomfort, or anger. On the other hand, “positive” body language – like relaxing the body or resting comfortably – can indicate happiness and trust.
2.
Pay attention to voice pitch.
The typical pitch of someone’s voice can alter depending on their mood. For example, when a person is sad, their voice tends to deflate, Cobb says. This means they’ll talk in a lower octave and at a slower rate. Faster, peppier, or more cheerful voices tend to indicate happiness.
3.
Pay attention to their breathing.
“If somebody is angry, their face may start to redden,” Cobb says. This reaction is generally caused by rapid breathing.
“When you’re in fight-or-flight, the brain is releasing hormones and neurotransmitters, and cortisol will start flowing,” she explains. “That increases your blood pressure and your heart rate, and your breathing becomes shallow and fast.”
4.
Look at the curvature of someone’s fingers.
This one may sound strange, but Cobb says when a person’s fingers have a slight curve, it likely means they’re at ease. “We don’t walk around with fully extended fingers,” she says, “it looks weird. When you have that natural curvature and there’s no tension, that lets you know someone’s feeling all right.”
5.
Check their lean.
If someone is interested in you or the conversation, they may lean in. “When flirting, more often than not, the space between the flirter and the flirtee will grow less and less,” says Scottrouse
On the other hand, if someone is fearful or uninterested, they may lean back. It’s important to take in all the context clues in these situations, especially.
6.
Look at their grip.
Just as some people will extend their fingertips in stressful situations, others may ball up their fists or tighten their grip. “If someone is already holding a glass or a mug, they may start to hold it tighter,” Cobb says. “You have this pent-up energy that your body has to release.”
7.
Pay attention to their movements.
If a person is moving more than they normally would be, that can be a sign of nervousness. According to Rouse, signs of nerves may include jiggling the foot or leg, chewing on the lips, wringing of the hands, and even ticks or nervous twitches in some.
“Breathing becomes shallow, and movements of the hands and head become quick and jerky,” Rouse explains. “Of course, that all depends on the level of nervousness.”
8.
Observe the nuances of their smile.
If a person smiles, that means they’re happy – right? Maybe, but maybe not.
Duchenne: This is a smile of true, genuine enjoyment, and you can spot it because it usually involves showing teeth and reaches the eyes.
Social: Also called affiliative or non-enjoyment smiles, these ones usually have no teeth, don’t reach these eyes, and are used to convey common courtesy and friendliness rather than genuine happiness.
Dominance: This lopsided smile looks more like a smirk, with only one corner of the mouth raised, and it can be used to convey confidence or even condescension.
